By Dina Aldabbagh

It’s not a one time purchase, you have to pay the price every day, and it’s a different price each day. Showing up is what really counts. 

Let that ring in your mind. Showing up is what counts. When I went to my university for my summer orientation, I was given a piece of advice that I’ve never forgotten, and now I understand it to be the cornerstone of life. A professor stood in front of hundreds of us soon-to-be college kids and our parents and told us of a student of his: the Pop Tart Kid. This kid came to every single class, and never took a page of notes. He just sat there at each class and ate his pop tarts while he listened to the lecture. While he put in zero work to retain what was being taught, he was present. His eyes were on the Professor, back and forth between his pop tarts, during every class. The Professor noted that this kid wasn’t the brightest student, and that there were many others with a more natural inclination towards academics. These smarter kids often didn’t show up to class, the Professor told us — they thought the content was easy enough that they could study it on their own or put in less commitment, therefore they skipped class often. The Pop Tart Kid ended up doing better than most of the class on the tests, just because he was there. Thus the lesson was taught: Showing up matters more than anything else in order to obtain success. 

The same is true for exercise, I’ve learned. My goal when I began exercising, and still, is to reach my move goal every day — which indicates a chosen number of calories you want to burn each day. This is what keeps me honest, because it’s not about how hard I go or what I do, it’s about showing up and putting in that time each day to reach that goal. Therefore it didn’t matter if it was running, lifting, walking, yoga, stretching, swimming, playing volleyball, or basketball, as long as I burned that amount of calories, my goal was maintained for another day. It doesn’t matter what I do as long as I show up. What this does for me, in turn, is give me consistency; it forms a habit — the habit of showing up.

I did still set certain goals for myself, though. I wanted to stay somewhat consistent with lifting so I have a goal of how many strength workouts I do a week. When I began, I noticed many, many days where I didn’t have it in me to go lift. The weights were right there next to the treadmills, but I was resisting it. Every fiber of my being didn’t want to go and commit 30 minutes to a lift. I realized, even if I can only get in there and give 40% today, it’s still better than 0%. So I would go with some goal I made for myself based on that day — ‘just lift for 15 minutes,’ ‘just do 3 different exercises,’ ‘just burn 80 calories’ — and while I would typically end up doing more, there were still countless days where I only did exactly that and then I left. I know there are some people out there who believe that if you don’t hit a certain level of intensity every time, it means nothing. I’m of the exact opposite stance. Remember, the price is different each day, so your “all” today is different from what your “all” will be tomorrow. It’s still better to do less than to do nothing. In my own wisdom as someone who’s tried and failed in the past and believes they’ve found the secret to staying consistent, it’s just about showing up and giving what you can for that day. 10% is still better than 0%, and the key is…you might have 4 bad days in a row, but if you show up on day #5, it may be your best day to date. Exercise is an ebb and a flow, some days will be better and some will be worse, but you only get to those better days if you get through the worst. 

There is no “perfect,” there is no getting 100% out of yourself every single time, get that out of your head. Give what you can, and leave with pride. And stop feeling bad about yourself because not every workout is the most intense. The only bad workout is the one that didn’t happen. If you showed up, and made it happen, that’s a good thing. Change your goalposts from being about outcome to being about effort. You can’t control the outcome of everything in life, even your own body unfortunately. Our bodies are entities far more intelligent than we can understand, and sometimes it really is just what your body says, goes. So make your goal, make the promise you give yourself, that “I will show up every day and give whatever I can that day.” 

We’re all human, and we’re all far from perfect; there is no flawless output. The people who show up every time, no matter what, are the ones who will succeed every time. The consistent ones will crush the perfectionists every time. It becomes no competition, because while you’re waiting to do something until you have just the right conditions and energy, there’s someone who — while naturally has less ability than you — is honing their skills just by coming to work every day no matter how they feel. There was a sign in my elementary school: Hard work beats talent when talent doesn’t work hard. That’s the key to life. You may look at someone who is great, who is well-rounded, who seemingly doesn’t falter in any area of life, and think they are just naturally made to be successful. That’s not true. The most successful people are the ones who have had to work the hardest. That well-rounded person commits to non-stop work, and the hardest work is devotion to something. I’ll tell you, I’ve realized that devotion is no different than just showing up. 

When I think about children, I observe what makes children love one person over another. It’s not that Person A is funnier, kinder, sweeter, or more generous than Person B, while those things surely do help. I noticed how forgiving children are — they can forgive almost any mistake, so they’re not looking for perfection. Children love the people who show up. They love the people who are present in their lives, who make an effort, the rest, they forgive and forget about. What matters is a person who shows up. You, too, will love yourself more if you show up for yourself, even if the presentation is imperfect.

Showing up is not just the secret to exercise, career, friends, or kids, it’s the secret to life. If you devote yourself to showing up, your life will be unrecognizable year to year. So don’t let intensity or outcome be the thing that motivates you to workout, let showing up be the thing that gives you validation. If you did something, you did good. The only bad workout is the one that didn’t happen, so if it happened, count it a good thing and go into tomorrow with pride.